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10 Signs Your Son Is A Hacker
Topic Started: Mar 30 2005, 09:57 PM (1,342 Views)
Ross
Inspire
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LMFAO, 45 minutes a day...you have GOT to be kidding.
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Charlo
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1337er than j00
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Wow. If that dad is serious, he is one of the stupidest people ever. He obviously knows next to nothing about computers. I feel truly sorry for his son.

Oh, Quake is an online firearm training sim. No wait, it's a video game. What an idiot. <_<
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GDF
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Hey
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Heheh
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RagingFuryBlack
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Quote:
 

If your son has requested a new "processor" from a company called "AMD", this is genuine cause for alarm. AMD is a third-world based company who make inferior, "knock-off" copies of American processor chips. They use child labor extensively in their third world sweatshops, and they deliberately disable the security features that American processor makers, such as Intel, use to prevent hacking. AMD chips are never sold in stores, and you will most likely be told that you have to order them from internet sites. Do not buy this chip! This is one request that you must refuse your son, if you are to have any hope of raising him well.


XD...AMD....klol...im gonna buy AMD and be an elite hAx0rz XD....

I guess i should go turn myself into the cops now
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Websurfer
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Also known as Myr
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Child labor in a processor creation environment? that's halarious, it's al done by machines and a few people, it's a very very fragile task.

AMD > all :D
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Dazed Enigma
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I personally find that the article posted was a total crock of crap. I spend about 5 to ten hours a day on the computer myself. I use linux, because its easier and more reliable than microsoft. and most of the other crap is random and biast.
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cloudpants
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ಠ_ಠ
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Quote:
 
how could i have been so blind...i have been putting firewall after firewall on my system. when along along i have tryyng to keep myself out... yes now that i have read your article i realize that i am a hacker...I have reviewed my computer and discovered filthy programs running amuck everywhere...Flash. MP3's. DOS. BIOS. and the holy grail of hacking, yes its true I HAVE LINUX, i am so sorry and at this moment the police are on their way to put me away...THANK YOU for opening my unworthy eyes

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since when was every bean head that listened to techno music and played with glowsticks a hacker? I hope you all realize how misinformed you are and might actually take time to research your assumptions before crucifying your child for the good of the moral majority. People like you make me sick.

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You know, all I really need to look at is the very first phrase:

"As an enlightened, modern parent..."

I mean really, I haven't had this much of a laugh in ages. And that's not even counting the rest of the article.

I am VERY curious about three things:

1: What's your source material for showing that Linus Torvalds was a Soviet Hacker, that Mandrake is a 'hacking program', and that Snow Crash is a 'manual'? Furthermore, I'd like to see where you got the hilarious notion that AMD isn't a legitimate company. You cannot MAKE PROCESSORS in third world sweatshops when the premium for quality is beyond levels of microns.

2: What EXACTLY did you accuse your son of doing, and what EXACTLY are your definitions of 'hacking'?

3: Have you ever considered the notion that your son's 'argumentative and surly behavior' are the products of your utterly amusing ignorance? But then, I guess your 'computer hacker' son doesn't find it all that funny.



... "As an enlightened, modern parent..."

*snerk*

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OMFG ROFL!!!!!!!!!!

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Dont worry too much my friend...apparentlly, we're all hackers...each one of us...*pats the other on the back* we'll overcome it...if only the good moral filled parents can save us in time, before we're all lost...

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While we are on the topic of "protecting" your family, you should cancel all TV services, because "underground" or "negative" influences could come from there. Next, get rid of your mailbox. There is always the possibility that pornographic material could be mailed to you. You wouldn't want anyone to be exposed to that, would you? Third, better cancel your telephone service, because telemarketers could end up giving your children experience to things that you may not want them to experience at the present stage of their lives. Next, cover all electrical outlets in your house. You never know, your children might not be smart enough to not stick a paperclip in the outlets (or maybe you should just remove all small metal objects from your house)? Don't forget to keep the garage door opener (if you have one) out of their reach! They might decide that it is fun to open and close it while they stand underneath it!

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Your son uses comet cursor to hack people, he plays quake so he can learn to shoot people? Please, just tell me you're not that dumb.

lol, I saw this like 2 years ago. I still crack up when I read it. :)

I use Quake to learn how to use guns, because if I can click a mouse to shoot a man in the heart, then I can sure as hell do it in real life with a real gun.
:rolleyes:
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catfriedrice
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Anatidaephobic
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I played quake a school, they were teaching us to hack? OMBWTC I'm a hacker
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Zero-Wing
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Use AOL? LMFAO
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Websurfer
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Also known as Myr
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Does your daugher request new panties? SHES A money! No girl should want new panties! who cares if hers were ripped, shes a money if she wants new ones!!!

I can see him writing one about whores and daughters, that would probly be in it :lol:
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National Panic!
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Quote:
 
8. Is your son obsessed with "Lunix"?

BSD, Lunix, Debian and Mandrake are all versions of an illegal hacker operation system, invented by a Soviet computer hacker named Linyos Torovoltos, before the Russians lost the Cold War. It is based on a program called "xenix", which was written by Microsoft for the US government. These programs are used by hackers to break into other people's computer systems to steal credit card numbers. They may also be used to break into people's stereos to steal their music, using the "mp3" program. Torovoltos is a notorious hacker, responsible for writing many hacker programs, such as "telnet", which is used by hackers to connect to machines on the internet without using a telephone.

Your son may try to install "lunix" on your hard drive. If he is careful, you may not notice its presence, however, lunix is a capricious beast, and if handled incorrectly, your son may damage your computer, and even break it completely by deleting Windows, at which point you will have to have your computer repaired by a professional.

If you see the word "LILO" during your windows startup (just after you turn the machine on), your son has installed lunix. In order to get rid of it, you will have to send your computer back to the manufacturer, and have them fit a new hard drive. Lunix is extremely dangerous software, and cannot be removed without destroying part of your hard disk surface.


Hell no..

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7. Is your son becoming argumentative and surly in his social behaviour?

As a child enters the electronic world of hacking, he may become disaffected with the real world. He may lose the ability to control his actions, or judge the rightness or wrongness of a course of behaviour. This will manifest itself soonest in the way he treats others. Those whom he disagrees with will be met with scorn, bitterness, and even foul language. He may utter threats of violence of a real or electronic nature.

Even when confronted, your son will probably find it difficult to talk about this problem to you. He will probably claim that there is no problem, and that you are imagining things. He may tell you that it is you who has the problem, and you should "back off" and "stop smothering him." Do not allow yourself to be deceived. You are the only chance your son has, even if he doesn't understand the situation he is in. Keep trying to get through to him, no matter how much he retreats into himself.


Wtf, this was written by a freaking over-paranoid soccer dad.
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Ivanhoe
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Quote:
 
Lunix is extremely dangerous software, and cannot be removed without destroying part of your hard disk surface.


roflmfao
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Hawkstra
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ƒc woot.
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thats cool pee nut
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Spat_AoC_ForumX
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1IvI 4 1337 H4x0Iz i pvVIv UIz Iv00b 4$z's. cl4IYIIv 57I24iGh7. (im a elite hacker i pwn ur noob ***'s. damn straight). If you can read that in the 1st version u seriously need to get laid lol. And btw....that is the dumbest article ive ever seen, WHAT a dumass..flash is a tech software, Mp3's are not hacking software, damn this guy knows nothing..bloody ignorance
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Lurk
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forces.ca
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lol...this is funny as ****
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