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Internet Relationships; Semi-Debate...ish
Topic Started: May 20 2005, 05:51 PM (2,253 Views)
Locke
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That one guy
The extent to which a person can get to know another via online communication is limited. Online acquaintances can obtain information about a person through messaging and such methods, but such knowledge can not be verified in many cases by the other party. And in many situations, a person adopts a somewhat different personality and attitude when online in contrast to their true self visible to those that they interact with outside of a computer.

Online 'relationships' have become a trend in recent years among not only youths, but adults. However, I am a skeptic when it comes to such relationships.

A relationship that is intimate in its nature, such as a boyfriend or girlfriend, is according to pyschologists, first formed upon attraction. The first stage of attraction is physical - one's body attracting another person sexually. This is a proven fact of the psychological world, even though some deny it. For a relationship to be existant, there must be physical attraction. To deny that is flat out saying that the person you are in a relationship is ugly, but you like everything else about them. You certainly aren't going to involve yourself with someone who repulses you.

Thus I doubt the actuality of online relationships in most scenarios. For example, an exclusion to my doubt is our very own Amy, who's online relationship evolved into much more.

I concede that people online can perhaps get to the point of friendship online (though in most cases, I wouldn't class it as friendship). However, talking and having what seem to be similarities does not make you a match made in heaven. Such a 'relationship' is missing one of the most important parts of a relationship - physical attraction.


There, now I've stated my opinions (or what I have the time to state). Now I'm interested in hearing yours. I may perhaps reply further, but I'm more interested in seeing how this develops. It was an interesting topic brought up today in school.
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finch
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You can always see them through a webcam. Though I do agree with your point about attitudes. I'm usually alot more bad-tempered offline.
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N00B™
A waste of everything you hoped for.
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Internet relationships are just...well, weird. That is to say that you probably haven't seen each other or talked to each other in person.

I mean, if you both have microphones and a webcam and talk over msn or what-not, then that's a bit better but still odd.
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GDF
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Hey
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I believe in internet friends, but I would never go for an online relationship. I try to stick as close to my regular personality though, so if I ever met anyone from the internet, I wouldn't be completely different from what I am online.
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Websurfer
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You can't tell me they are wron,g I've been in one for 1.5 years, it just recently ended. But you can get to know a person, I mean of course online isn't much, that's why there are phones. But strictly online I agree, you can't really know the truth about the person, but once you get on the phone and you get to talk to their family and such there isn't much difference other than physical activities.
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Ulf
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I don't think "online dating" or "online relationships" are a good way to have a relation ship as a boyfriend or girlfriend. I think that online relationship is something that can be fun but you shouldn't take it seriously and you should just date in real life.
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Clair
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Successful at last.
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N00B™
May 20 2005, 09:54 PM
Internet relationships are just...well, weird. That is to say that you probably haven't seen each other or talked to each other in person.

I mean, if you both have microphones and a webcam and talk over msn or what-not, then that's a bit better but still odd.

They aren't 'wierd', but each to their own. What suits me doesn't necessarily suit someone else, you cannot question the way two people meet and just flat out say it is wierd or whatever. And, unless you are in the relationship then you really dont know what you are talking about.

I am the same online as I am in the 'real world' and in my case the other person has both good looks and good personality, but in any relationship anyone has the personality is the most important I think. A friend of my mums met someone online and I believe they are now married with a child, a forums I was a member of two people met and ditto..there will always be skeptics but at the end of the day the only two people it concerns is the two in the relationship. ;)

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Nicola
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Zatharawrus
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I suppose its a fairly new concept since the Interent has only begun to take hold in the last few years.

I believe its possible to become fond of someone, and to enjoy their thoughts and comments, whilst interacting over the internet.

Ive had a guy I used to work with, who talked to me more over the net than at work, and he really liked me, and I couldnt understand it, because we barely spoke at work. Needless to say I didnt see him that way, and ignored him online when he left work, because he grew quit irritating. But I came to think that he only liked me for how I acted online because it was safe, he could say anything and not feel directly embarassed, and he was shy at work, but online he was quitr forward.

I think that people are not entirely themselves when they are online, being able to type your thoughts and opinions is different than being able to say them physically.

I think that physical attraction is important in every single relationship, whether people agree with that or not. There is another guyI know who I know likes me more than a friend, and I like him to, in a friend way, because Im not physically attracted to him. If I was, Im sure we would probably be in some kind of relationship. So physical attraction is important. People can however see a photograph of someone over the internet, and possibly they may become physically attracted to them. But how do they know that is them? Do theyjust feel this attraction because, again, its safe? No heated arguements, no embarassing moments.

If two people do become powerfully attracted to one another over the internet, it leads to you think how they cope knowing that they might not be able to meet, and that they can never touch them, kiss them... erm have sex with them?

I have to take an unbiased approach to this topic because I cant say I've been in any kind of relationship with anyone, offline or online, so I dont know what it feels like.

Although I have to add that my Aunt recently married an Argentinian U2 fan that she met off the U2 fan forums :ermm:
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N00B™
A waste of everything you hoped for.
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Clair
May 20 2005, 09:59 PM
N00B™
May 20 2005, 09:54 PM
Internet relationships are just...well, weird. That is to say that you probably haven't seen each other or talked to each other in person.

I mean, if you both have microphones and a webcam and talk over msn or what-not, then that's a bit better but still odd.

They aren't 'wierd', but each to their own. What suits me doesn't necessarily suit someone else, you cannot question the way two people meet and just flat out say it is wierd or whatever. And, unless you are in the relationship then you really dont know what you are talking about.

I am the same online as I am in the 'real world' and in my case the other person has both good looks and good personality, but in any relationship anyone has the personality is the most important I think. A friend of my mums met someone online and I believe they are now married with a child, a forums I was a member of two people met and ditto..there will always be skeptics but at the end of the day the only two people it concerns is the two in the relationship. ;)

Matter of opinion.

I just don't think that's what whomever create us-if someone did-wanted dating to be like. Though meh, I guess you're right in the fact that it doesn't matter the way you meet, as long as it ends up alright. :)
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Sytex
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AEKDB
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Internet relationships have a very low success rate compared to that of an average relationship where both parties are able to interact with one another without the aid of advanced communication (in this case, the internet).

I find it hard to believe that one person can truly have feelings for another person without physical encounter. Although they may claim to love their internet-companion, they may or may not agree with, subside to, or believe in the ideas, thoughts, practices of their partner, in which they know nothing of due to lack of communication.

Although internet relationships can lead to bigger things, such as marriage, it is highly unlikely. A sacred bond between two people cannot be fulfilled until both people meet face to face, eye to eye. You can find love on the internet, just as you can find love at the grocery store, high school, or tanning salon. It's just a matter of communication leading to future visits from either person to his or her partner.

I, personally, do not promote, endorse, or personally acknowledge "internet love", because there is no such thing. You may feel "feelings" for a particular person, but you do not truly love them. You may say you truly love them, but in reality, you hardly know them.

Internet relationships are usually short-term affiliations-nothing more. However, I've seen some relationships that have stood the test of time, and are going on four years. It's all a matter of the persons involved, the distance between them physically, and emotionally.

In conclusion, I find internet relationships to be a trend, mostly among confused and hopelessly romantic teenagers who have yet to find someone who they feel comfortable with, and resort to such electronic dating.
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InuyashaFrEaK-ZNR
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I think that internet relationships are fine, and they can be better. The reason they can be better, is that it's not so much about physical attraction which way too many people focus on, and it's more about personality. Believe it or not it is possible to have love online contrary to popular belief. So, all in all, it's a pretty good thing.
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Clair
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Successful at last.
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InuyashaFrEaK
May 20 2005, 10:06 PM
I think that internet relationships are fine, and they can be better. The reason they can be better, is that it's not so much about physical attraction which way too many people focus on, and it's more about personality. Believe it or not it is possible to have love online contrary to popular belief. So, all in all, it's a pretty good thing.

Well said :D
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Locke
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That one guy
InuyashaFrEaK
May 20 2005, 05:06 PM
I think that internet relationships are fine, and they can be better. The reason they can be better, is that it's not so much about physical attraction which way too many people focus on, and it's more about personality. Believe it or not it is possible to have love online contrary to popular belief. So, all in all, it's a pretty good thing.

I can't say I agree with that at all. Love is a serious thing, and unless you are lowering the definition of it, it purely isn't possible in a purely online setting. Love includes not only personality, but appearance, etc.
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Casey5
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Ulf
May 20 2005, 09:56 PM
I don't think "online dating" or "online relationships" are a good way to have a relation ship as a boyfriend or girlfriend. I think that online relationship is something that can be fun but you shouldn't take it seriously and you should just date in real life.

I agree. The only way I think to get to have a relationship is too talk to some person in real life. I certainly don't trust a lot of people online, maybe because I haven't seen them in real life, nor have I seen there real faces.

I just think that online relationships aren't the right way to start a life. Just go into real life and look for somebody. Most of online people in dating sites fake who they really are and are desperate for a new companinship. They can do that, but I doubt that it will really work out. Many people stalk and kill people online when they just slip out a little information. I don't think that Online relationships are right, because of the fake things people say and what they say are fake. I know that in some cases, nobody fakes anything. But I don't trust the internet as I do in real life, thus I am saying in my opinion that online relationships are wrong, and you should just really stick to finding someone out there in real life.
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Nicola
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Zatharawrus
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Also-

People have things that they like about their partners when they are married, like snoring (god forbid!), a twitching foot in bed at night, the way they kiss, how they fix their hair... you cant get to know that, get to know their soul over the internet.
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