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Chuck Norris Facts
Topic Started: Jul 11 2008, 06:05 PM (951 Views)
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Chuck Norris was born April 30th.
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Helena-ZNR
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No PMs on this account please
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Chuck Norris does not sleep....he waits.


There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.


Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Edited by Helena-ZNR, Jul 12 2008, 11:52 PM.
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Journet
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This is a place you'll never know...
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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

^^ My favorite. :P
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choas_pure
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If you can see chuck norris, he can see you. If you cant see chuck norris, you may be seconds away from death.

the boogey monster checks under his bed for chuck norris
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ev.
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Upgrade your grey matter, cause it one day it may matter
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Pssh. Mudkips could easily take him down.
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potterwiz11
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Chuck Norris was driving down a road when he saw a dead deer on the side of the road. He pulled over and walked up to the deer and rubbed his beard on it and it came back to life. Then he round house kicked it in the head and killed it again, to prove that The Good Chuck Giveth, and The Good Chuck Taketh Away.

Chuck Norris' Tears Cure Cancer, Too Bad He Never Cries.
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potterwiz11
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When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.

Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died. The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible. All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

These are some of my favorites!
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U_Got_WHAMMED
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The only reason they haven't cloned Chuck Norris yet is because if two of Chuck Norris' round house kicks met it would be the end of the universe as we know it.

When Chuck Norris jumps into a body of water Chuck Norris doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris.

People wonder what would happen if an immovable object met an unstoppable force, we will never know until Chuck Norris punches himself in the face.
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Floppy_Fennel
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This thread is lame.
These things are old and overdone.
Edited by Floppy_Fennel, Aug 2 2008, 09:26 AM.
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Maxen Government
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Your mom is old and overdone. ;)

It's harmless...

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting, because hunting implies the possibility of failure- Chuck Norris goes killing.

Chuck Norris was going to star in Terminator- until they realized doing so would make the movie a documentry.

Chuck Norris destroyed the table of elements- the only element he believes in is the element of suprise.
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Sean.
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International pimp of mystery
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Maxen Government
Aug 2 2008, 09:45 AM
Your mom is old and overdone. ;)
haha exactly what I was thinking :arr:


Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.


Those three are awesome XD
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Chronique
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Deletion.
Jul 11 2008, 10:49 PM
My friend once told me something like "Ever heard of the big-bang theory? Main character: Chuck Norris."
Lol, I like that one.

Here's another Big Bang-related joke:
Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly equal to 1CNRhK (Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick).

Perfectly logical.
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Woody.
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¬_¬
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"Chuch Norris is the only reason Wally/Waldo is hiding"
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Raymond
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de BULLY
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Whenever Chuck Norris walks, earth moves instead of him. That's why when you hear/feel magnitude or an earthquake, he's running.
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catfriedrice
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When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.


That's my favorite.
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